My reality check has your face and birthdate 

Only you can ground me

Thanks for making bearable 

this thing we call “existence”.

What's next?

 Color it cool

Keep me in and warm

Give me food for thought 

Make it worth my while 

Give me a word to say

To whisper your name or shout, 

either way you say you are mine 

You said it and you meant it

And I claim you like my Walgreens' coupons

Like my food stamps

I won't let you go

for I am angry and hungry and I came back for more

And you know I know 

That I only exist in your Matrix 

In your Neo world

You are the blue and the red pill

Forsake me and I disappear

Excitement without fear 

The next most valuable thing in your life 

Improbable alien light 

Hell disguised or heaven sent

Far too complex for you to understand 

So much so that I don't even care. 

So what is next? 

Maybe life? 

Or something else? 

Molasses

 Patience is not my strong suit anymore.

And here, time is sticky and dark, like molasses 

Creeping down ever so slowly

Asphyxiating

Heaviness gathering like dust 

One more unbearable minute,

(or perhaps, a year?) in silence 

And senseless sweetness.

Recommendation letter

 There is magic in seeing one's self in the eyes of someone who loves us, who believes in us.

There is power in stripping from the ego and tapping into my true self, recognizing my own potential 

2025-07-18

 Trying to compress the air that I am breathing before it gets to my lungs, so it won’t hurt 

Listening to “the silence” of the rain drops fall.

The wind moans. But at least cicadas and birds are not screaming again tonight. Like every other night.

Words hurt.

No truths, just hurtful phrases.

I see and I pretend not to see. Forgotten. 

Lost in the quietness 

of the rain.

Comer

Pez quiere comer pez que nada, 

entonces pez vuela, 

ave quiere comer pez que vuela, 

entonces pez nada, 

pez grande quiere comer, 

ave quiere comer pez,

pequeño pez volador se sumerge, 

pez grande intenta comer ave, 

ave intenta comer pez, 

pequeño pez volador escapa, 

todos quieren comer a todos, 

es una guerra allá afuera...

y también aquí adentro 

del mar 

salado.

Pez volador vs. Depredadores

Desert

 If I ever get lost in the red mountains of the desert, don’t come trying to find me. For most certainly, death has found me first and I don’t want her to find you in this hot dry passage, don’t come find death. I don’t want you to see my shrunken, sunburnt, dead body lying down in this brown crystal tomb. 

I know the desert is ungrateful. It’s a place that can curse you back if you but raise your tone at it in a fit of rage from thirst.

The heat of the desert is no place to be by yourself. It is best to stay in your home. It is best to forget the desert. Best to forget me.

Love and friendship

 May your loved ones never doubt how much you love them 

May they have a “yes” for you most of the time 

May your life be boring good, except when you’re going  on adventures and be present and together with the ones you are together.

Even if we’re far away, I want to call myself your friend.

I will be your sunshine whenever, you can talk to me, I will listen.

I wish you all the love you’re giving and I’ll give you as much friendship as you give me.

For love and friendship hold this life together

Grown-up

 Circe says I've become a "señora de las lomas"

But I say I am more like the adult my childhood self would have wanted me to be:

Coloring pages till late, eating donuts for breakfast, playing in the snow in winter and in the water in summer, listening to music, watching The Dukes of Hazzard.

Yeah, I am a really cool girl. Bring me back to the 1980s. Y ¡que viva el sur! 

Eucalyptus

 I want to listen to you. Your voice shall never be alone as long as I am living.

You are my practice, because you make me perfect:

Perfectly happy hiding in your arms any given evening. 

I am your eucalyptus: cling on to me like a koala. 

At least there is a slab of reality that brings us peace. How hard it was to find. 

But all the fuckery from the past seems to be undone by the present. And here we are: present.

People would say it's a gift from God; I'd say it may be heaven sent, but not a gift. We definitely worked for this.

And in the meantime, this place and time is ours to live. Live it fully. Feel it lively. 

Tennessee will always be a deeply cherished time of my life.