Cigarettes and Flowers

I enjoy you like a cigarette:

Staining my fingers and my lungs black,

Being a fire hazard

Knowing how much you'd love to make me smile, but you're just too much cancer.

I'd love you killing me slowly

Messing up things inside of me that I didn't know existed

Being the most relaxing unfortunate and ill-spent five minutes of the day

Investing on an early death and atrocity

Poisoning the air for me and everyone else around me

Being so void yet so important, 

So unnecessary and expensive but I can and I will keep you

Because I'm more stubborn than that

And I never knew how to quit.

I'd love you to comfort me

Consuming yourself slowly into my hands

Giving me your all while I believe myself that I live for you when

We were actually taking each other's life away slowly

Because that's how it is

And being together could never have been any other way.

I'd love you like the flowers withering away

Though they were for one frozen instant, so bright and perfect

They were all that I would see,

While I confidently ignored the unpleasant sight that surrounded them, never facing reality, 

Because this life is a pest and the world a graveyard or a hospital

And flowers are the etiquette for the sick, the only remembrance of beauty and the only thing that matters amidst the chaos.

I'd love you beautiful and soft, I'd love your smell and your looks. I'd be so careful -if I ever dared to touch you- because I'd never want to ruin you petals, even though I know well that you were doomed from day one to grow dry and bitter and die, like we all end up doing once and for all, after many instances along the way that a little bit of life was lost or given up each time.

Relentless as it is, our time is short and precious. That is why I can't help but to feel delight in this very moment, as you rest by my side and let my hands roam on your softness, as true as this breath I take in to inhale you.