Mystery of Life

There is no plan because I never thought I'd make it here. 

Way too far for me to recognize myself.

Dragged across the decades by life.

With no echo to my voice

Asking questions which answered no one.

Alone.

In a rare reality that made me turn inwards.

Finally realizing where this is all going

My body an open book for the first time 

Helped me to read and understand 

The mystery of being alive. 

And it came when I was already too tired 

But here I am, humoring the riddle:

I am the main character in this novel called____ (my name)

Within words that never end

In this lame joke without a punch line

For -we know-- I cannot die until I die.

It is just the ache of waking up another day.

The grandiose world too big for me to bite. 

But still I try to eat regardless

While I look for groceries online 

Simmering mediocrity instead of pursuing greatness   

And wondering if I will be remembered 

Or if this was a waste of time.