Robot

The website just asked if I am a robot.

Judging from the way I get treated at work, I am dubious. I may be a robot. 

And maybe these are not really my dreams, but the expected performance parameters of someone who programmed me in C#.

My interface is a little bit damaged due to poor maintenance. But so long as I keep my core function, no one cares.

Coffee is a vice to me.

Screens, a necessity.

I run on electricity and Wi-Fi.

Every morning I open my eyes, and there are things I have to do. Why can't I choose my own day?

Sometimes I'd sneeze, and people get surprised. Is it "Waste and Abuse" if I have to sneeze during working hours?

Please rate from 1 to 5, with 1 being "poor" and 5 being "excellent" 

the service I have provided.

Anyway... Duty calls. A robot must follow the human command.

Listen to Robot.m4a by Raine (Johana Denisse) on #SoundCloud

https://soundcloud.app.goo.gl/P7Mmu

El sitio de Internet me preguntó si soy un robot.

Por como me tratan en el trabajo, ya me hicieron dudar. Tal vez sí soy un robot.

Y mis sueños en realidad no lo son; sólo son el desempeño esperado por alguien que me programó en C#.

Mi interfaz está un poco dañada debido al pobre mantenimiento. Pero mientras yo siga realizando mi función principal, a nadie le importa.

El café se ha vuelto un vicio.

Las pantallas, una necesidad. 

Funciono a base de energía eléctrica y Wi-Fi.

Cada mañana abro mis ojos y hay cosas que tengo que hacer. ¿Por qué no puedo elegir mi día? 

A veces estornudo y se sorprenden. Y yo necesito tomar unos minutos. ¿Es fraude estornudar en horas de trabajo?

Califique usted del 1 al 5, donde 1 es deficiente y 5 excelente, el servicio que le he brindado hoy. 

En fin... El deber me llama. Un robot debe cumplir las órdenes de los humanos. 

Places

Listen to Places.m4a by Raine (Johana Denisse) on #SoundCloud https://soundcloud.app.goo.gl/vN8Zg

There are places I want to go

I just don't know how to get myself there yet.

I haven't found the right opportunity

But I'll keep looking.

I am hoping for a second home

A place of growth and challenge, where I can be human. 

I want to be me. 

We all need some acceptance sometimes.

When you come from a difficult background, sometimes it is difficult to believe that you deserve better. But you deserve better. I deserve better.

Blyatboy

https://soundcloud.com/raine-johana-denisse/blyatboy-m4a/s-yKblXpdptZi?utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

Steal my smile

Be my saddle to ride 

Make my life livable 

Stroke my thighs

Nuzzle my hair

Keep me up all night

Breathe into my ear

Drive me "crazy good"

Let me lose myself in your eyes

Raise my heart rate and lower my panties

and pull yourself close to me

ever closer under the covers

Say my name

Call it out loud

Love me and forget me

Give me what I want

Raincloud

https://soundcloud.com/raine-johana-denisse/raincloud-m4a/s-x13bTDScJQJ?utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

The Rolling Stones said "She's a rainbow"

The Arctic Monkeys said "Crying Lightning"

I personally don't think she's either. 

To me, she's a rain cloud most of the time

all beautiful and smelling like petrichor, 

all gray and silver and complicated 

and making things better only when she wants to,

because she can.

So perhaps she is the rainbow and the lightning

and the cloud and everything in between

but I am just tired of getting wet 

and I don't know how to bring the sunshine 

and get her to enjoy a sunny day

because I love swimming pools 

and she has a hot bikini body

but still prefers the rain cloud, and she hates the beach

and I would like to tell her, "Brace yourself

because life is going to hit you hard" -yes, even harder-

and I am going to be there for you

but I don't know if you'll want me

because I was so stupid some time ago

because I didn't do things your way

because I respond to your apathy in a way that you find abusive

and I don´t want to abuse you, but I just can't wait

forever for you to do your chores while you're out 

with your friends and you think everything else is more important

and you're taking me for granted, but then I get mad 

and can't help but become a bitch 

and then you get mad because I am a bitch -which I know I am, and I am sorry-

but I wasn't like that when I told you first, and you're just testing my patience.

She's a rain cloud, and I can't be the eternal umbrella.

And I know she'll say she doesn't need an umbrella, but at the end of the day

this is her home. For now.

Maybe later, when she can afford her own, she'll go away.

And that is not because I want her to go, but it is her who says she can not stand me.

I don't know. I just ask her to make lunch and wash the dishes once a week.

And to smile once in a while. 

I don't know.

How does one love a rain cloud?

War

And there were dry flowers hanging from the vase.

Even fleeting roses outlive your will.

The world is at war but you are not my trench.

I tried to be your sword lily. Your bunker.

I tried so hard to blossom in you. 

8 to 5

One good day they found my dignity for sale

And I got an offer I could not refuse

My intelligence misplaced, my life misused

For living and surviving are not the same thing

One day I gave them the right to tell me I am not enough

My passion dead somewhere along eternal shifts and backhanded compliments

Never had I been in an ark so toxic

Yet I show up and smile everyday 

If I am not worth that much, then go ahead, pay less

But you don't have to be that way

Sorry to disappoint you

I'm not what you expected but you're all I've got for now

Each cent you've given me I've repaid with each second of life

And now the love of me, my wellness, is all gone

You managed to turn into a dreadful hole what used to be my core

My excitement into boredom 

I don't recognize myself anymore. 

Alone in January

I still dream of his vanilla skin and his thin lips

even though I know he is an island a thousand miles away from me.

In a different planet... I wonder if love exists there 

in the cold Nevada winter

safely hidden away from me

or if it is how I had imagined.

Is it too much to ask for? Or am I always chasing after impossibles?

-Different reasons- my friend said.

He makes me crazy to the point I need a chill pill.

I wish him here with me. He wishes I was there with him

Yet, being together does not always mean being close 

and this is not a game, you know?

So let me feel these hours

Sours

Maybe you will later let me know how you feel

Is it really cold in here? Or is it just your heart?